Many hold onto resentment, withholding forgiveness because they doubt the person who caused them pain has genuinely changed (or ever will). Some offenses resonate so deeply that these individuals adamantly believe they could never extend forgiveness. Profound hurts such as betrayal, the agonies of torture, the realities of child abuse, or the tragedy of murder leave lasting scars. As a result, the path to forgiveness can feel challenging.

In Acts chapter six, however, we encounter the powerful story of Stephen and Philip, who were chosen alongside five others to address the needs of Grecian widows in Jerusalem. They exemplified true devotion and were filled with faith, wisdom, and the Holy Spirit. Tragically, Stephen met a brutal end, stoned to death for his unwavering belief in Jesus, with Saul of Tarsus present endorsing the act of violence. As persecution intensified, the disciples scattered, preaching the good news wherever they went. Philip boldly proclaimed Jesus and His Kingdom in Samaria and along the road to Gaza, where he shared the Gospel with the Ethiopian eunuch. Eventually, he settled in Caesarea, raising four prophetic daughters. Consider the striking moment when the Apostle Paul—once the very man who had consented to Stephen’s persecution—stayed with Philip during his travels in Caesarea (Acts 21:8-9). Here was a man who had inflicted tremendous pain, now transformed and striving for righteousness, and Philip welcomed him into his home! Would we have the courage to embrace someone as this? This doesn’t mean we should forgo discernment or wisdom; Paul had spent years proving his profound transformation… But Philip’s decision to extend fellowship and forgiveness to Paul is a profound example of grace and the strength to forgive even those who have deeply hurt us. 

Many have faced far more grievous harm than I have. While I can’t fathom the pain of losing a loved one to murder, I understand the sting of betrayal and deceit. I, too, wrestle with deep scars making forgiveness a formidable challenge. Yet I am also reminded of Jesus—blasphemed, spat upon, tortured, publicly shamed, and crucified, all for my sins! If I can humbly accept that Jesus died for me, and if I can forgive myself, recognizing that both Jesus and His Father are willing to forgive me—despite my repeated failings—then I must summon the strength to delve deep within and forgive those who have wronged me, regardless of the depths of their transgressions (Matt. 6:15).

30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 

31 Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. 

32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.

~ Ephesians 4:30-32, NKJV